you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
