I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
