Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize