So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
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