On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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