my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
