VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
