I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
