I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
