I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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