We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
