you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
