google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I am midnight drunk by noon
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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