They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
