using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Randomize
