So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
