That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
P.S. I can't hear my feet
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Randomize