At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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