She's JV to your varsity
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize