this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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