One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
