And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Randomize
