what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
