that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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