I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize