A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
