whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
