South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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