I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
