you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
