I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
If I die, sorry about rent.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
