What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
last night I used snow as a chaser
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