im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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