I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize