You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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