Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Randomize
