three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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