She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Randomize
