Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
In America we eat man semen.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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