I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Your penis caused this!
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