real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
