Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
