Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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