She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
