What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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