Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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