between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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