508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize