That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize