He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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