yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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